Never promise me!

To the love of my life, ❤

This is not the first one I am writing to you; we used to write notes like this. Precisely me. And you were always eager to read my musings and you made clarifications and corrections.. 😛 So, there is nothing special today honey! Today is as special as yesterday. 🙂

I know you hate promises. I know you don’t believe in Vows or Waadas.. Either me too. You trusts me is the best part in our relationship. You listens to every stupidities I blabber and shoots a killer smile at every stupid things I do. You left me independent in my own way & always made me fly. You dragged me into my favorite bookstores and made me smile even at my dull days. You made me sleep in your arms on the days I was off from hectic work days. You never promised me all these.. But you always kept on doing it! ❤

Those evenings in which your fingers entwined in mine.. Your eyes drowned in my eyes and those words from your lips which always makes me smile.. I love You! What else I need from you? 🙂

You never promised to surprise me; but you always! You never promised to care me; but you always! You never promised to make me smile; but you did that every moment. You never promised to walk with me; but you always! You never promised me anything; but you made me happier always making me feel that I am the luckiest girl in the world. You never promised me but I know you silently promised yourself on caring me & loving me! I know you will keep on loving me always. I know you will held me closer always. I know you will make me smile always! ❤

So on this normal special day, dear sweetheart, promise me that you won’t promise me ever. Promise me that you won’t try to flatter me with vows. Promise me that you will be like this forever. 🙂

And in return I promise you that I will keep on loving you. I promise I will be there for you till the last breath. Will care you till the end of the world. Will love you to the moon and back.. Always!! Always!! & Forever!! ❤

Lets walk together in the happiness and the sorrows.. In the worries and laughter.. Every Day & Night!! 🙂

With <3,
The girl you loves! 🙂

 

“I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda

Why Today?

Am I gonna post this?
Yes I’m.
Why?
Because today is February 29. I am not sure whether I can make a post on another February 29th.
What’s so special on this day?
There is nothing more special on this day. this day is as special as yesterday and the day before.
Huh! You are making yourself complicated.
Yes! Everyday is special and today is a bit more special. Because this is a special granted 24 hours to us for this year. Which gives an additional turn to earth. Which makes a 365 to 366. 

Even in my writers bloc mode why I am doing this?
I don’t know actually. But I m feeling this 24 hours is a privilege to us. A chance for us in every four years to live more. Laugh more. Think more and do more. And long after (If I live up to that long) I would like to login to Word press & read this post on another February 29th to cherish the memories of the day.

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Screenshot from my mobile.. 🙂

So, What so happened on this day.
* I woke up at my Cousin’s home this day; because today is Monday.
* I had a drive with my Brother.
* My bus got complaint in half way & I had to got into another one to reach Office.
* I ordered 4 books online. (Amazon is giving good deals.. 🙂 )
* I had my lunch alone. (My colleague got some urgent work in between)
* And now I am writing this post.
(What happened next will be added soon, Now it’s almost 3.00 pm IST)

And one of the great news today is Academy Awards.

Leonardo Di Caprio owned the Gold man at last.. After years and years of waiting.. Proving if you deserve it, you will definitely get it.. 🙂
And the best I heard on this day is;

” Let us not take this planet for granted. I do not take tonight for granted. Thank you so very much.” – Leonardo Di Caprio
So let’s cheer up & make a good day.

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Leo.. I love you.. ❤

All congrats to Academy Award Winners!

P.S : All the lovely people in my life.. I love you more & more.. ❤

Stay blessed!!
Happy blogging.. 🙂

when SHE opened her little eyes!

Everyone will be having their moment in life. Best moment in life! Which brings goosebumps to our body. Which can make you cry in happiness. The moment of lifetime. I guess everyone have such a moment. If you can’t find what it is; wait; something big is coming on your way. I am a person who find happiness in every simple things. (Even in a simple smile from a stranger. Really! 🙂 ) In these 24 years I lived, it’s just that one simple day that makes me cold as an ice. I can still hear that shrieking voice ringing in my ears.

It’s almost midnight. I was not feeling comfortable in that chair in front of the labor room. I turned to my Mom. Anxiety and stress filled in her eyes. Dad is sitting in the other end of the corridor. I got up and walked randomly. The chairs in front of the room is packed with people. What they all have to say? Agony, Chaos & all above; eagerness. I walked towards Dad and sat next to him. “Can I make a call to Jeeju?” Without any pause he handed me the phone. I started dialing to my brother-in-law; mom warned me that he may be asleep. I checked time. Its 12.15 am; only 9.45 pm in Qatar. Not a big deal! After all its his wife who is inside that room. He answered the call in a sleepy voice. I conveyed the message that she got pain and is taken to the labor room. He said OKAY and disconnected the call. I saw my Mom praying frantically. I was not that afraid as she is; but yeah! A lots of delivery stories and all are already in my head. I need everything to be fine with less pain. (It won’t happen 😦 )

I looked around. Stretchers, Wheel chairs, Oxygen cylinders, White gowned nurses, White coated doctors. In a sudden moment I felt so blue. How hard it is to be in a hospital? What if it’s for a lifetime? Every eyes with a story of pain or hope; or so many other unwanted feelings. Then I realized why I chose to be an Architect. Why I hate the medical field. Actually I don’t hate; I am afraid of it. I can’t withstand this atmosphere; I m sensitive. In a moment I thanked Almighty for creating Doctors and Nurses in this world; who are less concerned about their lives and more about other’s.

The door of the labor room swung open; the doctor came forward calling out my sister’s name. Mom sprang up and was about to run to her.Doctor gestured to sit there itself. “She is having pain; a little fever too. There is nothing to worry; You should wait. Let me see.” Mom freeze. Tears were trickling down. She returned to her seat and started crying. I was in a confusion on what to do. Is it getting complicated? Dad comforted us by saying there is nothing to worry about. He already passed two such situations alone, while Mom was inside the labor room for me and my sister. Dad called Mom’s sister. She is making her way to the hospital. After a few minutes she came with her son(my best friend). After seeing my mom, my aunt too started crying. What a strange sisters! :O My Dad tried his best to keep them calm. I sat with my cousin in the corridor. 

Its Onam after two days. Someone was cleaning the ground floor lobby when she was taken to the labor room. A floral competition was going on between the different departments in the hospital. Today was canteen employees turn to show their creativity. They started the design by drawing a Ganesha in the center. While all this happenings; I often checked how is the design progress (the typical designer in me 😛 ). It’s almost 2 am now and half of the design is completed. As usual we babbled about our old days and memories; it all ended up in ‘Ek tha tiger’; the new release then; already watched by him. I was looking forward to know more about the movie. (the typical movie freak in me 🙂 ). 

altAqHuSBDcXfZ_bm54SePA4xl493bNdjEcEc_YD47OV_P0Its 5.10 am and they are doing their final work in the design. Someone is trying hard to place flowers to complete Ganesha. After some adventurous tries, they managed to place the eyes for the Ganesha (two dark flowers). There came a shrieking cry breaking the whole silence. The door swung open again. Once again her name called out. “Nothing to worry. It’s a baby girl.” THANK GOD. I smiled. I smiled with all the happiness without realizing  that this shrieking voice is going to make me smile throughout my life till now. After a few moments,their came the new member of our family.Nurse handed over her to Mom rounded in a Pink baby blanket. She looked amazed. She winked her big black eyes and made a yawn. Welcome to the world honey! Giving a mere smile she returned to the sleep. That’s it. My more colorful life started from there on wards. 

Years passed. She started crawling, walking, talking. She even started helping me in making floral designs. Turning 3 on the coming Onam, she is the best present I got from Almighty. Who can change my every tear to smile 🙂 . I often tells her she was like a little rabbit when she was born. Now, whenever she see a picture of rabbit she asks me “I was like this or beautiful than this?”. I always answers, “Nothing is more beautiful than you.”

I don’t know whether anything wonderful is coming on my way. But for me, till now its she and the moment she came to my life is the best ever happened to me.

memories : my way to escape

Feels like a rain had pour down in my mind just now and washed away every sorrows…
I opt everyone to watch their favorite movie when you are depressed..this one i tried out and i succeeded…

Escape from the worries…what i wish always…what everyone wishes…i worry about my present…i wish my life to be like my past…but i always forget tomorrow, today will become my past…i don’t know what i m waiting for..sometimes even i don’t know what i wish…and then i fell down and realized this is life…

Everybody have their own ways…getting on to my i pod and playing my most favorite song brings me smile at times…even makes my mind calm in the most frustrated situation…it wont be that song…it may be just the memories related to that song that makes me feel calm…or a movie like what i tried today…or browsing through the pictures of our favorite people…favorite moments…through my most favorite book…or through my phone where i saved so many precious texts…At one moment i felt…its past and i can’t get it back… 😦 but the next moment i realized those memories makes my life… 🙂

There may be so many things disturbing you…for me…always…away from home deep in my heart every moment i miss my home…when every moment i talk to her i cries…and i can’t belive still i cries… (after 45 days)… and it makes me feel better…makes me feel that i m still my mom’s child!! I don’t know whether its all good memories with her…she never fed me food with her hand yet…she never said i love you to me even i had said it thousand times to her…but she kissed me and cried whenever i stepped out of my home for a long journey and i wish i could go again and again to get that single kiss…i love that tenderness…and the one feel that she is mine!! 🙂 miss you mom… ❤
And yet again i have much things that made me worry…little ignorance from my best buddy…disappointing face of my brother on his failure…being a jobless and the thought that i wont be getting the thing what i wished most…i always wished to go back to that exam hall for AIEEE, 4 years before and i had attended that one question i missed…then i will be the most happiest girl in the world!!!Leaving that nightmare behind was the hardest job i had and realizing the fact that i can’t become an Architect..And now too i am wishing for something i will never get and this time i am well prepared…because i hadn’t got what i loved most…yet…

The treasure i have now is memories…the one think which helps me to escape…escape from the worries…some good memories…from the day of my birth to today…23 years of journey and i still remember everything which made me happy and sad…2 years before this day made my life change…the day of my grandmother’s demise…what she was for me i don’t know…but what i lost with her is a big family…a thousand memories and a home where we 100s of people always made the blast…with this day i lost myself for the next 2 months and over a year i cried every night without any reason…i never found i had grown up…i hugged my mom tightly at nights thinking that i cant miss one more person from my life…i was scared of death and i was scared of everything…that moment i started loving every moment…every thing in my life…i cared about everyone more and more and it always hurted me…but i continued caring for others even more than myself…i often got hurted…but i never minded…it may be because of that my best friend called me a saint…

No one can change you without your permission and no one can hurt you…if you cry for someone, you had given them the permission to hurt you…if you love someone…love unconditionally…and give your tears and grief to the one who deserve…

let this memories stay forever!!! good or bad…i love them..because that makes my life!!!otherwise its just a blank page..now its a wonderful diary!!! (some pages with lots of smileys.. 🙂 🙂 🙂 and some wet because of my tears… 😥 ) but i always find happiness in that…

Feeling that somewhere the words and sentences are not kept in position…not arranged…this is not an edited version…may be editing is needed…for the one person who never misses my post…shifaz…m sorry for this bad one… )